FNN Report: Romney Speaks Out

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Mitt Romney speaks out at a press conference and Faux News Network political reporter Stacy Conundrum is there.

Mitt and Ann Romney spoke to the press for the first time since Mr. Romney lost the presidential election last year.  The thrust of Mr. Romney’s comments was that President Obama is doing a poor job and the country wouldn’t be in this mess if the voters had elected him as President.  “For instance,” Romney said, “the sequester thing wouldn’t have happened.  I would have embraced the brilliant plan put forth by Speaker Boehner.  Another example is the Pentagon.  It wouldn’t be facing budget cuts, I would keep the military budget at its current all time high.  To compensate, budget savings would come from the ridiculous giveaways in the funding for social programs such as education, arts endowments, transportation subsidies, FEMA grants and unemployment benefits.

“I would also cut the funding for those organizations that make if difficult for corporations to make profits because the corporations have to adhere to nit-picking regulations like pollution controls. Every dollar spent on these obscene pollution regulations comes straight out of corporate profits.  In effect, the regulators are stealing from the corporate stockholders.

“And I’d never raise taxes on the wealthy.  The wealthy are people, you know.  Just like corporations are people.  We have to treat them fairly.

Mrs. Romney also addressed the press and said, “I still haven’t gotten over the loss of the election.  I had my heart set on redecorating the White House from top to bottom.  I even had the best decorators under contract and working on plans.  Mitt gave me a budget of one hundred million dollars for the project which would have been paid from taxes since the White House belongs to the people.”

Mrs. Romney paused and with a tear in her eye, continued, “You know, this was the first time in our lives Mitt and I were deprived of something we wanted.  The folks who voted for Mr. Obama have no idea how badly they hurt us.”

FNN will issue more reports if the Romneys make additional comments.